“You are now officially an old lady,” he said to me when he saw the pothos cuttings in a vase on my kitchen windowsill. That was five or six years ago. I told him the pothos needed trimming and it was a waste to just throw the cuttings out. He shook his head sadly. They [...]
Yes, I’m verbose. _______________________________ Geoff Hoff is co-author of the best selling satirical novel Weeping Willow: Welcome to River Bend
April 27, 2008 – 10:42 am
It didn’t take the movie The Italian Job for me start coveting a Mini Cooper. The first time I saw one, I decided it would be my very next car. I was then driving a black 1988 Nissan Sentra, a wholly practical, dependable, sensible, staid box of a car. I loved my Sentra, who I [...]
April 25, 2008 – 12:50 pm
One two three four five He thinks he’s written a poem Instead, it’s just words _______________________________ Geoff Hoff is co-author of the best selling satirical novel Weeping Willow: Welcome to River Bend
April 15, 2008 – 10:32 am
As a young boy in the remote New Jersey town called Flatbrookville, I hated peas, those grey-green orbs piled on my dinner plate threatening to roll over into the mashed potatoes (a favorite) and pollute Grandma’s wonderful pot roast. They smushed on my tongue into a slimy mess that tasted unnatural with an undercurrent of [...]
Spy Magazine, that wonderful satirical magazine that slowly started losing subscribers as it slowly devolved into a bitch fest, had a great feature called “Logrolling In Our Time” which presented two members of American intelligentsia giving favorable, often glowing critiques of each other on their respective pulpits. It was surprising how many pairs of mutual [...]
I’m tempted to start this post with a fart or nose picking joke. You see, I have been told by many people who should know that my humor is too intelligent and I want to get along. Hello, my name is Geoff and I’m a recovering intellectual. It all began in grade school when I [...]
There is a dentist who has an office just under ours in the building where we have our office. He has a late model BMW. Not even a particularly nice late model BMW. Whenever he drives it to work, he spends several minutes putting a custom fitted cloth covering over it. The covering has snug [...]
I recently moved from a little guest house that I’d been living in for fifteen years to a two bedroom house with a great, rustic, overgrown back yard complete with brick patio covered with wood trellising, a quaint seventies type rock fountain and a kidney shaped pool. Just to the side of the patio is [...]
Christopher Fry’s delightful verse play, The Lady’s Not For Burning, opens with young, pretty Alison Elliot, having recently been let out of the convent to marry, entering the town hall sun blind. “I am all out at the eyes,” she says. “I have a winter blindness.” Richard, the clerk, sees her, is instantly smitten and [...]
